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Gold Medal Software Volume 2 (Gold Medal) (1994).iso
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TIME.TXT
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1993-01-10
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TIME Copywright (c) 1993 by Dave Byter, proliferate freely.
What's time to a geologist? A geologist's unit of time is the
megayear. That's a million years, for those of you who haven't
yet learned your metric system.
A few million years ago there were giant animals living in a sort
of tropical paradise. Man was but big monkey who could throw
sticks. A few tens of millions of years ago our ancestors were
just another funny rat in the jungle. And a few hundred megayears
ago our ancestors were little more than ugly fish.
Time for an archaeologist is measured in kiloyears. A few
kiloyears ago man was changing from a rare species of ape roaming
about the countryside, to a city builder with a written history.
A few tens of kiloyears ago man was a big carnivorous ape who
could build a fire and make a spear. A few hundred kiloyears ago
he was some dumb ape trying to run without putting his front paws
on the ground.
Time for a historian is measured in years. A few years ago we
put a movie actor in The White House and a Pole in The Vatican.
A few tens of years ago Capitalism was beginning the
petrochemical age, also known as the Garb Age.
Time for the common man is measured in days. A few days ago he
got his paycheck. A few months ago, er ah um, I don't remember
anything special that long ago.
Time for the electronics engineer is measured in microseconds. A
few microseconds ago his electrons were running in the other
direction.
Well, another 0.000001 megayear has passed. Have you ever
thought about how difficult it is to communicate with someone who
holds a different concept of time than do you?
What do I say to an electronics engineer? It seems like a long
time, about 30 quadrillion nanoseconds? See what I mean?
It used to be the physicists who could put together the whole
concept of time, from femtoseconds to terayears. Now they all
work for the Department of Energy, building bigger and better
bombs. They hope that time will last long enough for them to
enjoy their next paycheck.
30 nanoseconds doesn't seem like so much time. I mean, I can't
think about it. Literally, like the clock speed of my brain is
so slow that it is essentially in the same state that it was in
30 nanoseconds ago. It takes millions of nanoseconds to think
about a nanosecond. A logical impossibility.
30 megayears really isn't long ago, when you stop to think about
it. Should you somehow step through a timehole and come out 30
megayears ago, you wouldn't see much difference. You should
bring a boat, because the land was mostly ocean, just like now.
Unless you brought your oceanographer, you wouldn't notice
anything very unusual. Should you make landfall, you would
probably see some rather unusual plants and animals. Is it Papua
or Pago Pago? Don't bother asking the natives. They don't speak
your lingo, and some are more than a little cannibalistic.
Don't get the idea that there are any of those extraordinary
monkeys. The ones that have the funny fur and walk on their hind
legs. But everybody else is there. All the weird bugs and
beasts that you would expect to see in some exotic or exchronic
place.
*The Exchronos Courier Corporation, Unlimited, states that it
specifically denies that any of it's couriers are, ever were, or
ever shall be, involved in the smuggling of contraband. However,
each courier is allowed to chose the ballast mass transchronned
along with the body and other personal effects. We maintain our
own Customs Office and maintain a constant liaison with the
Customs Office of the host time, as well as with our own time.
We specify that the ballast mass be specifically legal in both
times, and that no materials be transchronned which would have an
adverse impact upon either the host time or our own time.
Environmental Impact Statements may be required for any or all of
this material.
The Exchronos Courier Corporation, Unlimited, states that it is,
always has been, and always shall be engaged in the
transchronning of fine pharmaceuticals for private clients.